Chapter 478) Reset

Del Sol Valley
Villa ViVa

I hear his footsteps and smell his cologne before I even catch a glimpse of my brother Nick in my peripheral vision.

I look up at him as he lowers himself down next to me, his pants rolled up, his shoes and socks removed as he sticks his feet into the pool next to mine.

“Thought I smelled cheese …” I tease him.

“Sorry, can’t hear you over the person to my left urgently wanting to go for an involuntary swim!” he teases back, wrapping his arm around me pulling me so close it’s almost painful, which he makes up for by planting a hearty and honest kiss on the top of my head, when he notices how emotional I still am, he plants another on my forehead, extra-juicy, while letting me go as I fight him off, vicariously rubbing my entire face.

“Eeew! Poor Addy! Gross!” I protest into his laughter.

“Never had any complaints from her about me being too … juicy.” he winks at me.

“Ultra-gross.” I make the appropriate sounds of sheer disgust.

“You’re starting to sound like yourself again. I like that. Tired of the hoity-toity Queen AG. UGH! You having married into that family really opened my eyes on royals. And I always thought Addy’s dad was bad. Man, compared to your in-laws good ole Ezio Auditore Senior was a fuckin’ delight.” he tells me with a lot more sincerity in his voice.

“Yup. Prince of my dreams comes from a family of nightmares. Coming here was the exact thing I needed. Maybe what happened had to happen or I would have never tried to get out. I see now that I needed out.”

Nick’s smile fades and his face turns darker as he tells me.

“AG, something like that should NEVER happen to anyone. I almost blame Max more than his incestuous brother! May change my mind next time I see that Leopold. He’d make a great punching bag. AG, we need to look at the custody thing. I have a good draft ready, needs more detailing but it’s a solid overview. This needs to be speedy, looks bad to a judge if we drag our feet on something so important.”

I shake my head and look into the distance.

“Well, you got some time. Not too much though. Gotta have it in the bag by late tomorrow morning.”

“Are you leaving?! Already?!” I ask in almost a panic.

Nick shakes his head.

“Nah, chill, I’ll be here for a few more days, the good thing about being your own boss is that I get to make my own schedule. But tomorrow late morning is when I am picking up your belated birthday gift. Well, gift is probably a poor choice of words, more an experience, but it’ll make you smile. Once you got that gift to unwrap – bad choice of words again – anyway, you won’t focus on legal papers after. So, chop chop.”

“What gift? You didn’t have to get me anything.” I say, but am at the same time wondering what it could be. Nick always had great taste. Whatever it was, I wanted it!

Nick shrugs.

“It kinda presented itself to me. You’ll see. Different topic: Do you want the kids to move in here right away or when the school year is out for a clean cut? I am torn there and I know it’s not my decision but, part of my wants to get on the next plane and grab them now, the other part remembers I am a father too and pulling kids in the middle of a school year and dumping them into a new school is rough. I am sure grandma can call in a favor on the school board to get them signed up right away though if you want them now, I could try file an emergency order.”

“No.” I say, and get up, walk away from the pool as if I could walk away from the bad feeling all this leaves. Nick follows. Of course he would.

“No what, AG? I gave you two choices, you gotta be more specific on what you are saying no to, I am not a mind reader. Not even after 10 years of marriage. Addy trained me well, but even she has her limits. Damn we’ve been married a long time. Goddamn I am old.” Nick trails off. Yeah, vanity runs in my family.

“You’re not old, you’re only in your mid-thirties, and you have been dating Addy since you were 15, just seems that long, so chill. And by no I mean … no everything, Nick. Leave them with their father.”

“AG? Dafuq?!” Nick looks at me as if I had lost my mind.

“Nick, I don’t want them. I love them, but I am not as good a mother as Max is a father. I can’t parent alone! I’d 100% screw those kids up!” I sound as panicked as I feel.

“Ahem … AG … in the documents I drafted we are asking for full custody. I think you should have full custody. They can visit their dad, sure, even though I really do not trust that Leopold around your kids, especially my niece! Vic is 6 and you can see she will be incredibly beautiful one day, I am the uncle and seeing it, Leopold is her uncle, so he sees it too. Too risky! You have a lot of people here to help you with the kids.”

“Nick – no! I can’t do it. I don’t want to do it. I am not you or Adrianna. You make parenting look so easy! I don’t feel it’s easy! I freak out half the time and don’t know what I am doing the rest. Max wanted kids so early and so badly, because of his father and rules and all, so let him deal. I don’t even know who I am anymore, what I want, where I want that. I can’t raise solid kids if I haven’t the first idea about who or what I am! I don’t have a job or a real home … I moved back in with our parents, Nick! I’d fuck them both up for good! I can’t …”

I stop talking and start sobbing, Nick pulls me in, rocks me gentle, kissing the top of my head.

“Shhhh … okay okay … I get it. Sorry, I didn’t mean to be all … all … ahem … “

“Nick-like? Pushy A.F.? Full-on-Cameron?” I offer in a whiny tone from up against his shoulder and feel him chuckle.

“You say that like all that’s bad things. I am a proud Nick-like pushy AF Cameron and you should be too. Oh, reminds me, you didn’t ask for that, but I did fill out a request to legally change your last name back, by the way. Look, AG, whatever you need we’ll do it. I am a dude, I can only guess how you feel, not pretending I know exactly what that does to a woman, I read some up online, part because I want to know and part because I am gonna be the one going to court for you, dad worries he would lose his cool and tear Max to shreds, not sure I won’t, but at least I am not an occult. I had long talks about this with Adrianna and with mom to understand better and realized you need time and space now. I am very eager to cut your ties with that Cromwell family ASAP, but I shouldn’t have pushed. You’re right, you need you-time now. I need my sassy-sissy back. So tired of that dowdy-ass 28-year-old grandma the Cromwells turned you into.”

“29!” I correct.

“No, still 28 cos you and I haven’t celebrated it yet, meaning it doesn’t count yet. Stick with the program!” Nick determines. An old rule back from when we were kids when our parents were split up, and I lived with mom and Nick with dad.

“Oh, hee hee. Right. Are you offering me a partyboy-Nick-from-before-he-was-married-kinda club-hopping-all-nighter, where we get trashed and embarrass ourselves publicly?”

“Something like that. Your birthday will be re-celebrated in a parent-free environment. Better late than never, right?”

“Only a few weeks late anyway. Luv ya, Nicky.”

“Love ya more, AG. So sorry we couldn’t protect you from this.”

“Nobody could, and you are here now helping me in a big way. Plus, I am strong.”

“Cameron-strong. You always were. We both had to be at times.” Nick says.

The next morning, I had just signed about half of the pile of documents Nick had left colorful flags in, each flag demanding my John Hancock or at least initials, feeling more like homework now.
Extra-credit actually, cos I already had done an even thicker stack with dad earlier, which he already went to file with the local court, when Nick returned with my ‘present’ as he announced from the door, which was behind me.

“Honeyyyyy – I am hoooooome – bearing wonderful gifts!” he jokes.

“You got my gift?! Can I turn around?” I ask, giggling.

“Depends – are you done signing like a good girl?” Nick tells me, I can hear the glee of torturing me in his voice.

“Noooo ….” I drag the word out.

“Then no. You sign, I’ll hold on to the present a while longer.”

“Okaaaaaay…” I huff annoyed, bursting for curiosity as undoubtful had been Nick’s intention, when a familiar scent hits my nostrils. A certain type of after-shave. So I sit there, legit sniffing the air like a dog, when it hits me.

I simultaneously turn around and jump up off my chair and see him, standing there two steps behind my chair, smiling big, his teeth so white against his velvety brown skin.

“ROHAN!!! ROOOOHAAAAN!” I scream at the top of my lungs as I jump into his arms. Literally JUMP.

He catches me, laughing, as we hug and snuggle and even kiss. Ahem, on the cheeks and such. Unfortunately. Then again, as tempted as I am, Rohan is a married man. And Nick is probably crazy enough and not above spanking me.

Finally, after a dozen or more twirls, he puts me down and I look over at my brother, smiling self-righteously as he should, so I run into his arms too, kissing his cheeks till he pushes me away.

“EEEEW, yuck! Not into banjo-moments you lil creep!”

From then on, I act like a little girl around Rohan, holding his hand half the time and I don’t even care, I don’t even let go when mom and dad come down to greet him. He endures my clinginess patiently and nobody else says anything. Naturally mom and dad knew he was coming. Obviously, Rohan is staying with us. A few days of bliss for me.

For the next few days Rohan, Nick and I go out, on walks, shopping sprees, just out, mostly being silly during the days, then dress up and dance in a different club each night. And while sweating and dancing and screaming as the music blares around me, I realize I finally feel like myself again. Tiny glimpses here and there, but they are me. AG. Aria-Grace.

Sometimes my parents join us to go out, promenading, even clubbing, but for the most part, they let us be young and dumb and crazy amongst ourselves.

Usually during the day we play or lounge by the pool, working on our tans when not trying to prank the others. Yeah, I’ll be all right again. Eventually. Somehow. And I will be ‘me’ again one day.

I am facing a divorce and a custody agreement, I have been traumatized, and yet, I sit here with my mom, dad, big brother and his BFF, all of us laughing so hard, my lungs feel like they are about to burst. Crazy. Only a day and change ago I felt like I would never be able to laugh again.