“Real love doesn’t compete; it completes.”
~Unknown
Henfordshire
Cromwell Palace
Furiously I burst into Max’ study, very inappropriate for my status – and Max’s, but I couldn’t care less if I tried. My blood pressure went through the roof, as Charlene shot me one of her icy glares, but smiled and chirped her goodbyes at Max for what felt like a hasty departure because of me.
“Your Majesty …” she implied a bow of her head walking past me.
The moment the door shut behind her, I shot Max a death glare and aired my frustrations.
“What was SHE doing here?!” I hissed.
“She requested a talk in private.” Max told me, smiling.
“Oh, I BET she did! Behind closed doors with no staff present. Convenient for her and not inappropriate AT ALL, let alone suspicious. Nope. Not at all.” my words were oozing sarcasm.
But instead of guilty Max only looked bemused, clearly trying hard not to laugh, throwing me off my jealous tantrum. Chuckling, he came to me, taking my hands into his, pulling them up to his lips to plant gentle kisses on their tips until I pulled them from him roughly.
“You’re in an awfully good mood today. But wrong, if you think you can smooch your way out of this?!”
“Out of what, queen of my heart? What you saw is not what you seem to believe you saw. That is all I might say on the topic as I have been sworn to secrecy, hence the need for privacy.” he clearly enjoyed yanking my chain, which convinced me that I hadn’t caught him doing anything inappropriate with – URGH – that woman.
I knew Max. This was innocent or he would act differently. A relief sure, but also angered me as it would mean I had been wrong. Not like I wanted to be right, but I hated looking like some Karen on overdrive in front of Max.
“Why would you have secrets with your ex? I demand to know what this was about, or I have to assume … inappropriateness. There are rumors, you know?!” I told him pouty.
His smile reminded me of the side of him only I knew. Most people thought Max was stuck up, distant, aloof, with no sense of humor or passion, since he was always so composed. Let’s face it, he was the nerdy kind of cute visually, not the type of man that walked into a room and all females quit breathing and drooled puddles, so the first glance perception would fit.
But I knew that Max DID have a great sense of humor, he could even be naughty, he loved to tease me, flirt with me, dote on me and our children, and you will have to take it from me, he didn’t have to hide in the marital activities department. He was a good and generous lover.
Who now openly grinned at me deviantly as if he read my last thoughts on him.
“Might the queen of my heart be … oh, dare I say it? – the tiniest speck jealous?” he teased, clearly basking in it now. I just wanted to slap him upside the head, but he also looked kinda cute like this, totally un-king-like. Yes, that is a word, and if it isn’t, it SHOULD be.
“Oh no, Max, not the tiniest speck, try furiously angry and massively jealous. Max, I know a different side of her, the one without a sugary-sweet mask you see. She’d do ANYTHING you get you back. I know that, everyone knows it and most suspect an affair. I know better, but you and her behind closed doors all alone is only fueling the rumors. Not to mention her hopes to succeed at some point.”
“We deal in rumors now? In that case, this sounds awfully familiar, hmm, where have we heard all that before, I wonder? Oh, that’s right, my queen and her Jack! The tinder to my inner green-eyed monster. Isn’t jealousy just a fickle something?” Max was clearly teasing and not concerned, as he smiled and winked at me.
I blushed deeply. Jack and my feelings for each other had cooled more and more, and now I can honestly look myself in the eyes in the mirror and say that I did not love him anymore. I loved Max. Truly and deeply. And only him. But it had taken a while to arrive here, and all throughout, Max had patiently waited for me to … well, recalibrate, while I still pined after Jack, secretly as I thought, but now I knew Max must have known. Yet, this man who could easily trade me in for almost any woman he wanted, stuck it out. More patient than most men would be, probably to punish himself for his mistakes of the past. He loved me. Truly. I didn’t have to guess. It was in every word, in every gesture. And I loved him. Fully and wholly.
“Aria-Grace, love of my life, light in my darkest of nights, when will you believe me that I am not interested in any other women. And most certainly not Charlene Ashford. I had the chance, I could have married her, but I didn’t want to then, and I most certainly will not risk everything now. I will admit, your jealousy, though unwarranted, is just another testament to how much you love me, which just made my day. Fine, I will tell you in strictest confidence, you mustn’t tell anyone, not your parents, not the other ladies and forgive me for being so blunt – definitely not Bianca. She cannot keep secrets if her life depended on it. Say you won’t tell, and I will share.”
Max’s words ran deep with me. I never thought about it that way. He and I were divorced, he was dating Charlene, if he had wanted her, he could have made her his queen. But they were broken up long before I found out about it. From what I heard after the fact, they had barely made it 3 months till Max cut her loose. Well, the man does have good taste after all.
“Fine, I won’t tell a soul. So, what is it? Are the four riders of the Apocalypse coming to take Charlene back home, to hell, where she belongs?”
Max snickered.
“You are adorable, and beautiful, even with a mild greenish tint. Fret not, in a nutshell, I merely agreed to grant her request to be the officiant at her wedding.”
My mouth gaped open, eyes grew wide, as I stared at Max.
“Wedding? WHAT wedding?! To whom? Who would marry THAT? Lucifer?”
“Oh, my beautiful queen, how can such a flawless beauty spew such unkind words. She is marrying Lord John Montfort-Yates. He and I used to be what one might call best friends growing up, but we drifted apart when I went off to attend university, and he decided to take up traveling the world. He has always been rather adventurous. But we are all getting older, he is the last of his name and now feels the needs to settle down, so recently he returned to Henfordshire where we happened upon each other during a ride. Well, I played matchmaker again, and it would appear I have a knack for it, as this marks my second Bull’s Eye in that department. What I didn’t foresee was the speed at which they would progress. I went to see Lady Ashford at her home downtown, where I had also summoned John to, made the official introductions and they had still not run out of topics to speak about by the time I left. Turns out he invited her on a Caribbean cruise on his yacht, evidently during which they grew truly fond of each other and returned engaged, but also … how shall I put it … in a rush to the altar.”
“Oh my God, Max, if he is or was your friend, you’re not gonna let him marry that, right? That poor man! I didn’t even realize she was dating anyone at all. And why do you have to officiate? You’re not a priest, you’re her king! And what do you mean by they’re in a rush? Who’s ever in a rush to get married, all that planning, unless you … OMG! NO! She’s …. he … they ….. OMG someone would fuck that?! I am sorry, I meant … never mind what I meant.” I stared at Max, who was smiling.
“Oh, I knew what you meant, and yes, evidently someone would. John told me in confidence that he is very fond of her, he always liked his women spicy, has had so many eligible bachelorettes of good standing presented to him, even back before his and my paths parted all those years ago, but those daughters of aristocrats only ever bored him with their prim and proper ways. We both can agree Lady Charlene sometimes forgets her manners and while she most certainly doesn’t have your inner fire and passion, she isn’t necessarily what one would call boring, so I think for every pot there is the right lid. She appears to feel the same way about him, as she just sung his praises to me. I would almost bet they are truly in love. If it wouldn’t be unfit for me to bet.” Max said, his tone mischievous.
“Max, can I ask you something very personal?” I wondered.
“You’re my wife, you can ask me anything, but I bet I can guess.”
“Hit me with it.” I challenged.
“You want to ask me – again – how intimately close I might have ever been with Charlene. Even though I told you many times, I never went past kissing with her and only ever during the time we both were divorced and seeing other people, for very obvious reasons. I know history is littered with bastards of royals, which rarely ever ends well for the child or its mother, so I just would never risk it. Restraint and self-control have been drilled into me, since early childhood, more so even than my siblings, for I was to be the next leader, groomed to be king one day from the moment I was born. And not to seem rude, but you, my love, have inadvertently proven my theory. Unplanned pregnancies tend to happen at inopportune times more often than one might think, fate seems to have a rather twisted sense of humor. We are both aware how little you wished to have another child, and especially under the given circumstances. You see, as odd as it may seem that a man would decline intimacy when it was so clearly offered then and maybe even still until recently, I never felt very tempted by the risk of lifelong consequences, doesn’t seem worth the moments of pleasure with someone I knew I wouldn’t want to spend the rest of my life connected to by a mutual child.”
That did it for me. I felt as if I were blushing, but then paled again.
Whoops.
Here I was probing my husband about other women he might have had while we were separated, while I needed several paternity tests to prove I am the hussy here. Good thing I am no hypocrite. Riiight. Ha. Yikes.
“Touché. Sorry.” I said with a small voice, looking down, when Max lifted my chin to face him.
“For what? Loving me enough to be jealous? I am jealous myself, just hide it better. While you were clearly raised to voice your emotions, I was taught to suppress them. Sometimes, that can be helpful.” he smiled.
“So, THAT’s why you hooked up Jack with Izzy, right? Prophylaxis?”
“In a way. Successful leaders are good strategists, and it is always the best strategy to avoid potential issues by removing a probable cause for temptation or diverting the attention elsewhere. Despite of all, personally I like Jack, I love his daughter, and I won’t deprive him of seeing her grow up, but I can see how he could seem tempting to most women, and I knew he was still very much hung up on you and some might say vice versa. The good strategist finds a way to work that to his advantage. Nice side-effect, a happy man makes a happy father. Win:win. Same reason I set up Lady Charlene with Lord John. Should fix the nasty rumors, and your worries that I might still be interested in the devil-woman. And it gets her out of my hair, once and for all. Between you and I, I feel obligated to the Ashfords, but she gets on my nerves. Intensely so at times.”
“You didn’t just call her that!” now I was very amused. Max usually remained Switzerland and never would call others names. Ha! Take that you wicked witch of HOB!
“Even I can see through the act, my beautiful rose, even the king who at times behaved like his own court jester, which is why she and I didn’t last long. It was VERY off-putting to me that she was taunting you each time you came here, even though I specifically asked her not to, as I never wanted to see you hurting again. I saw the Harpy beneath, and I also realized quickly that it has never been me she was interested in, but my title and the prestige. Well, at least now she comes close, as the soon-to-be wife of the Duke. That is as close to royalty as she is ever going to get. And you won’t have to worry about her any longer. Well, at least not as perceived competition. We both will have to deal with her in future, more so than before now, I am afraid, but I have faith in Lord John to wear her down to tolerable levels. He has always had a certain way with the ladies. I cannot wait for you to meet him.”
He chuckled, I had to laugh before I kissed him. We made out until someone knocked at the door and it opened, right at the worst possible time as I was enjoying myself at the moment and would have probably wanted a lot more from Max than kisses, even right here in his study.
I grunted in dismay while Max answered, which was the moment where I learned we were having afternoon tea guests. Who, incidentally, had just arrived at the palace.
“Oh dear! Apologies, my swan, it slipped my mind that I invited Jack, Izzy and Jackson tonight, while I was searching for you at the stables earlier.” Max smiled apologetically.
Another kiss and we went to the foyer together to receive the visitors, before giving them a detailed tour of the palace ourselves. An unspeakable honor, and judging by Izzy’s wide-eyed mute stares, she knew it.
Jackson was less aloof with me then he used to be, but it was clear, he was his father’s son, and while he occasionally seemed impressed by the palace, mostly he just looking like fish out of water, scanning for the exit at every turn. Kudos to both men, who had made an effort to dress for the occasion. While the suits were tie-less, they were several steps up from the usual jeans and shirt, not to mention the cowboy hats. All that had its place, but not here. Most definitely not here.
The afternoon tea I took with Izzy and Jackson, entertaining them best I could, my kids were with tutors and Jack had gone with Max to his study to talk shop, but I also knew that Max would bring up one of his biggest thorns in his side. The Royal Equerry, Jack’s new position for a couple months now, basically the royal stablemaster, oversees and is responsible for anything equestrian-related for the royal house and was the main liaison between us and the stable business. That meant, whenever Max and I travelled by horse or carriage, the Royal Equerry would be there with us, accompanying us. For that, we cannot have Jack in cowboy hats and Jeans that haven’t been washed in so long, they stand on their own. He’d have to wear a uniform and knowing him, that would be a fight, one I gladly let Max have with him. Somehow, those two seemed to have bonded in some odd and highly unusual way. Both respected, even admired, each other enough to be able to not having to resort to the old ‘ex versus ex’ routines. Good for me, and especially for Vivienne. I know both men loved that little girl with great passion.
Max and Jack were both smiling when they rejoined us, leaving me to assume that the request for a uniform didn’t cause too much discord. Then the kids were brought in. Viv spotted her daddy, calling out for him while running as fast as her little legs could carry her into her father’s open arms, who caught her, crouched down, before standing up twirling her through the air, which made her squeal and giggle hard. Jack kissed her a few times, then turned to Izzy.
“Iz, this is my daughter Vivienne. Hey Viv, can you say hi to Izzy?”
“Hi to Izzy.” Vivienne instantly said, inciting laughter throughout the room. Yeah, she was a Cameron by blood all right.
“Hello beautiful. My, you look like a faerie.” Izzy cooed at her.
“Which faewie? I want to be the faewie of horsies!” Vivienne wondered.
“Of course!” Izzy confirmed.
“I wanna ride a horsie now! HORSIE HORSIE!!!” Vivienne demanded, typical toddler-style.
“Vivienne Grace, baby, you know the rule: no horsies indoors. They don’t like carpets and you cannot ride them in here. And all the horsies are sleeping now. They went night-night before Jack, Jackson and Izzy came over.” I tried.
That jumpstarted my other two kids into unhelpful actions. Hey, they are the most royal, most well-behaved kids, unless they are in private and feel comfortable. Then the Cameron comes out in them. No cure for that.
“Sure she can ride in here!” William claimed, grinning, as he pointed at Jack. Annotation here from me, since you might not be aware: royal children do not point. Ever! Nor do they grin. They politely wear a hint of a smile, and imply a direction covertly. Sigh.
“Yeah, there’s her horsie! Jack, do the horsie thing again!!!” Victoria clapped, jumping up and down. I don’t have to say it, you can guess here that isn’t appropriate behavior for a royal princess either.
“Jack is the horsie! I wanna ride too!” William decided and ran to Jack, plastering himself up against his leg, as Jack caught him with the arm he wasn’t holding Viv with, then just stacked incoming Victoria on top of William to imply the hug for both before he got down on all fours and all three kids took turns riding on his back. When tired of waiting their turn, William took over, loaded Victoria on his back and now were racing Jack and Vivienne.
I guarantee you, this dining hall has NEVER seen anything like it in the centuries it has existed. The eyeballs of the staff present were about to collectively fall out, but we were their king and queen, if we wanted to have our guests and children crawl around on the floor, so be it. Truth be told, when amongst ourselves, Max and I were no different when playing with the kids, plus my family treated them like normal kids, so this wasn’t so unusual at all. Max relived a utopian version of his own, very restrictive youth, through them, so he was always on board. I am surprised he wasn’t crawling on the floor too. He was a stickler for rules, but for our second round as husband and wife he has made tremendous changes as to how far those rules reach, and they stop at our children’s doors now, with few acceptable exceptions. They are kids, after all. As long as they all remembered how to behave in public, no harm, no foul. And so far, they had never slipped up.
Even Izzy stood by wide-eyed, watching the royal children roughhouse with her boyfriend and I was waiting for little smoke clouds to shoot from her ears as her brain imploded. Jackson took it all in stride and curiously looked around the room and out windows, then let out a ‘whoa!’ when he found the hidden balcony, a direct connection between the royal bedchambers and the place where you can find cookies late at night. In case of ’emergency’. The balcony is a wonderful spot to look over the rolling hills of Henfordshire and on clear days, you can see the belltower downtown.
The dinner itself went great. Jack and Jackson always had a good appetite, and with the quality of food we provided, they plowed through everything, while covertly exchanging grimaces across the table with my oh-so-very-well-behaved-royal-children. After a while, Izzy joined in, trying to not giggle too loud. Watching her and Jack, it was clear enough for a blind man to see that she was good for him. It could not be more obvious. I don’t know how my husband did that, but he got that one right. Plus, he kinda fixed my Charlene jealousy worry. I looked over at him and Max winked. I swear he can read my mind sometimes.
As I sit here now, post-dinner in the garden, absolutely inappropriately and unforgivably in my husband’s lap, who absolutely inappropriately does nothing about it except kiss me over and over, as we are watching the children play with Jack, Jackson and Izzy, I realize that while life brought much heartache for several here present, we all ended up right where we were meant to be in the end. End? No, this isn’t the end, not for anyone. It’s still the beginning, even for Max and me, most definitely for Jack and Izzy, and Jackson let slip that he was seeing a girl he likes, from back home. But had I not left Max after serious heartbreak, I would never have met Jack, we would never have made Vivienne, had we not, he and I would have just gone our separate ways and Jack would never have met Izzy. Jack would never have met Jackson either. That was because of Connor, whom Jack would never have met without me.
You see, this list goes on and on, and now, we’re all happy. My mom always had that saying about sometimes lies are necessary in order to tell the truth. An oxymoron, but also truth, if you think about it. Sometimes the worst lies are the ones we tell ourselves. But when you wake up from that, you are all the happier. I am happy. Max is happy. Our children are happy. And clearly, Jack is very happy.
EchoesOfLegacy 